Support
Coming alongside others and providing gentle, appropriate assistance with a problem or struggle. (Galatians 6:2)
“I feel like I am carrying the weight of the world!”,”I’m overwhelmed!”, “I can’t take much more!” ………..Have you ever been there???
Not trying to be negative, but most people have been or will be there at one time or another. Do you agree? Your spouse may have been at this place or may be there now. If not, perhaps you and I can be prepared to meet the need for support for them if/when he/she does arrive at such a place of desperation or “overwhelm-nation”.
Here are some examples of different ways your spouse may receive support:
- You notice when he/she seems sad or not very engaged, and you offer to help or just do what needs to be done without saying a word.
- When your spouse mentions feeling overwhelmed, you come alongside and help bear his/her burden.
- Perhaps you know your spouse is facing something difficult, and you offer input and assistance or at least ask if you can help him/her prepare.
- Your spouse is engaged in a project or long-term task, and you do something for them or pick up another one of their tasks to give them time to complete the work.
Often when I actually think that I need support, I am already feeling a sense of desperation for someone to “please help”! Support doesn’t always have to come at the point of desperation. It can also be simply help around the house, with errands, or a word of advice and wisdom from someone you trust when making a decision. Support can also be to help someone through sickness. I think if the need for support goes unmet, though, that is when desperation may take hold.
What about you? In what ways do you feel supported? What happens when that need goes unmet? Can you think of a time when you felt supported and one when you did not?
THREE SOURCES OF LIGHT – Help Us Experience Support
Light Source #1: Jesus is the Light of the World (John 8:12) Walking in the Light: Having a fresh encounter with Jesus.
Who in scripture was overwhelmed and needed Jesus to come alongside? Using your own knowledge of scripture or doing a search, would you come up with two or three people in scripture who needed support and got it from Jesus? Peter – walking on the water, sorta’ Woman at the well Temple official whose daughter had died Others:
What burdens or struggles have you experienced in the last few weeks or months with which you needed support?
Did you take that burden or struggle to God in prayer and listen for His answer? Did you receive support and help for carrying that burden from His Holy Spirit? Did God send help through another person or resource?
Jesus met lots of needs while He was here, didn’t He? He also sent his disciples to meet needs and share the Good News of salvation as well as the Good News of loving relationships in the body of Christ designed for us to help and care for one another.
Have you ever reached the desperation stage of needing support and you could barely cry out to Jesus!? Do you know that He hears your every desperate prayer and He longs to bear those burdens that weigh you down?
Journal: Personal Time with The Savior Do you Trust God to bear your burdens? Will you tell Him specific ways He can support you? Will you write down previous times God supported you? (Often remembering the past allows you to realize you can trust Him now!)
Is your need great to feel supported at this moment? Would you allow God to shelter you under His wings? (Psalm 91:4) He is your Abba, Your savior, Your Redeemer and He would love nothing more than to have you “crawl up in His lap” and tell Him all about your need. Would you trust Him and do that today?
Light Source #2: God’s Word is a lamp and a light, so walk in the light of frequent experiences of doing His Word. Psalm 119: 105
Let’s do: James 5:16 (Pray for our spouse) Galatians 6:2 (Bear our spouse’s burdens) 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (Encourage and build up our spouse)
What do you think would start to happen in your marriage if you started to practice daily just the three scriptures above? It would probably be pretty amazing – don’t you think? Just think about yourself for a moment…what would happen if your wife/husband began to pray for you daily? What if he/she began to ask how to help you with a project, yard work, household chores errands, or with the kids etc….? What if your spouse praised you in front of friends for a great job you did or left you encouraging notes or send texts when they knew you were facing a challenging day? Wouldn’t you feel supported? Wouldn’t that grow your love for the incredible husband/wife that God gave you? Now…. what if you BOTH did that??? YEP! Would be pretty awesome, huh? I don’t know about you, but I surely want that happening in my marriage!
Light Source #3: God’s people are sources of light so walk in real fellowship with our Spouse: “the light of the world.” Matthew 5:14
Our prayer is that as a married couple you would grow in your relationship to be the best person on your spouse’s support team! We have friends that give us support, but who better to be your best friend than your spouse? Your spouse prayerfully is your best, most intimate friend with whom you get to share the rest of your life! Friends may come and go, but you need to be that friend that “sticks closer than a brother”..
On your next date night…psssttt you should be having regular date nights BTW…. why not talk about how you feel supported by one another. Take turns sharing how you personally feel supported and be sure to point out past times you have felt the support of your spouse. Talk about being your spouse’s greatest friend and support and that you desire to be that for him/her in better ways in the future. Then…practice it daily!
Maybe you are not used to being the kind of support your spouse needs. It may take practice, but after time it becomes your new normal! You will “catch” yourself falling into a support role, naturally, as your spouse needs it. I love that when we are purposeful about things we can change our behavior to match what our heart desires most. Ask God to give you a heart “for” your spouse! By becoming the best support person in your spouse’s life, you will communicate clearly that you are “FOR” (not neutral or against) him/her. To love as Jesus loves