Approval (Blessing)
Building up or affirming another person, particularly for who they are (as opposed to what they do); affirming both the fact and the importance of our relationship with another person.
Ephesians 4:29 Mark 1:11
A Worthy Goal: (a little “Truth in Love” from TBI)
Don’t stop investing wisely into your marriage and family until your children and friends envy your relationship and want what you have…. “faith expressing itself in love” – Galatians 5:6.
Ever overheard someone talking about you – good or bad? Which one feels most like Approval? 🙂
Obviously, being commended by someone helps us feel valued and approved. Ever been speaking to someone about a person and that person walked up about that time? Could be awkward if it is criticism and wonderful if the conversation was approving. Each of us needs to know we have value. Why? Because – we actually do have value. Maybe this week we could practice approving of others and help remove aloneness.
Have a great week!
Sincerely, Dave Lewis The Basic Idea Helping Leaders Live Loved and Give Love Freely….Starting at Home!
Set aside a few minutes this week or plan a date night to discuss APPROVAL.
Husband, would you lead this time? Please be prepared to lead by reviewing the questions below. When ready, please initiate a “LOVE (Speak)” time.
LOVE (SPEAK) Fresh Encounter with Jesus Christ
1. Does Jesus approve only of Roman centurions in the First Century AD? If you want to put yourself in the centurion’s place, just take a few minutes to read the first part of Matthew 8. Close your eyes and picture Jesus commending you and approving of you to a crowd that probably hated your guts? (sorry, I should probably choose a more polite phrase) The centurion was certainly not (most likely) a perfect person, but Jesus was amazed at his faith and let him know. Listen to our Father God and hear how much He loves you and is proud to call you His child.
Frequent Experiences in the Word (Do The Book)
Let’s DO Ephesians 4:29!
2. When did you last express to your spouse that he/she has qualities that you admire? What qualities in your spouse’s life do you admire? (honesty, neatness, organizational skills, kindness, gentleness, discipline, fun, affectionate, assertive, quiet, diligent, loving, etc.)
3. When people write references for you, what characteristics do they list? What character qualities do you wish others would write about you in the future, if a reference were required? What reputation do you want to have?
4. Appreciation and Approval differ in that appreciation may be given for things you do (work hard, help with the housework, paid the bills, listened well, cooked a meal, mowed the lawn, etc); whereas approval refers to the qualities you possess (servant-heart, giving, kind, respectful, etc). So Appreciation is for specific actions while Approval is for trends seen in your character. Would you make a list of 3 items under these two differing categories that are things you appreciate and qualities you admire or approve in your spouse?
Appreciation _____________________ _____________________ _____________________
Approval _____________________ _____________________ _____________________
Enjoy Real Fellowship with Your Spouse
5. Would you find an appropriate time and place (at bedtime, over a meal, in the car, on a date) in the next few days to tell your spouse some things he/she does that you appreciate and qualities they possess that make them a blessing to your life and to others – showing approval? Hold hands and pray to thank God for each other and tell Him why you are thankful for your spouse.
Now — What About the Kids? “Ask- Listen- Respond”
You and your children may benefit from discussing the following questions with your spouse or other caring adult.
1. As parent(s) discuss with one another and other parents what qualities you hope to see in your children? List as many as you wish.
2. What are ways you can help foster the development of some of the character qualities you listed for your children?
3. What attributes do you see/have you seen in your children that lead you to believe that each has great potential for future success in life? Does each child know you approve of him/her and have you told him/her, “I am so grateful that you are my child.” No need to connect the comment to a recent behavior. Approval is letting them know that they are blessings and enrich your life just because they are in it.
Don’t Forget to Pray for them, with them, over them, outside their bedroom together with your spouse, often!
Appreciation / Gratitude —It’s in the Book!!
Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
Mark 1:11 And a voice came from heaven: “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.”