Security (Peace): Establishing and maintaining harmony in our relationships and providing freedom from fear or threat of harm through expressions of vulnerability, deepening of trust, and the successful resolution of conflict. (Romans 12:16,18)
The two year old I (Linda) nanny has a new saying, “Oh! It’s scarewey! Will you hold me?” She started realizing that she is frightened at some things, bugs, wind, loud noises, the vacuum, airplanes flying over us and she realizes she will feel safe when I hold her.
Our children trust us or at least they should! If they grow up feeling secure and safe, they will probably grow into confident adults. If they grow up without feeling security with their mom and dad, they may grow into adults who have trust issues with others or even with themselves.
Simple reassurances, like holding a frightened two year old and speaking reassuring words will go so much further than we may realize in building security.
Jesus – The Light of the World: (Jesus Meets Our Need For Security)
Joshua 1:9 says: Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.
God promises to “hold you” when things are “scarewey!” Do you believe and trust in His promise to you?
Maybe you have things happening in your life right now, maybe they even involve your children, will you be strong and courageous knowing your Father is with you? Does that help you to feel safe and secure?
Sometimes we read God’s Word and we don’t remember that the Words that were written so long ago still apply to today! What was written long ago, we can still hold onto as truth for our own lives today! THAT should help you feel secure?!
His Word – A lamp and a Light
Let’s do: 1Peter 5:7: Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
When your little one, or big one, feels afraid…remind him/her of this promise. Help them to memorize 1 Peter 5:7, so that when fear comes – as it will – they can hold onto a wonderful piece of truth!
Teach your children to cast all their anxiety onto the Lord by praying with them when they are afraid. Teaching your children how to pray will help them to feel secure in the Lord, especially during times when you might not be with them. They will begin to recognize that Jesus is near.
Mom and Dad! You can cast your cares on Him too! Being a parent can be so difficult at times. We fear for our kids, don’t we? Cast those fears and anxieties onto the Lord….He wants to carry them for you! We are not meant to carry our fears alone any more than our children are. We need Jesus.
You And I Are “The Light of the World” – Jesus Said So.
It is amazing to me how our children, at times, will see their relationship with the Lord in a similar way to how they view their relationship with you.
We, parents, are God’s light to our children! We can reflect security to our child or child of influence. Helping our children feel secure not only helps them personally to trust themselves and others but it’s foundational for their relationship with the Lord.
You can meet your child’s need for security in many ways…here are a few examples:
- When you detect that your children are fearful, talk to them, reassure them, pray with them.
- Meet their physical needs: clothes, food, care, love.
- Meet the need emotionally: reassurance, encouragement, comfort.
- Make sure to get into your child’s world often. Do things that he/she enjoys.
- The more time you invest in your child, the more secure they will feel! God gave these beautiful children to you…enjoy them! Of course, this investment must be balanced with time with spouse, time alone, and with others.
- Use kind words and speak truth in love with your spouse, other adults, and other children.
Conversation Starter: You and your spouse / friend can help each other identify signs that indicate when your child is afraid or insecure. You can also discuss ways that you felt secure or insecure when you were a child. Finally, in your conversations with other adults on this subject, perhaps you can talk about ways each of you can help your children feel secure or heal from the times they were left in anxious situations too long.
Perhaps Psalms 27:10 will be helpful in your adult conversation.
“Even if my father and mother abandoned me, the Lord would take me in.”
Did you ever feel abandoned? Were you abandoned? How is divorce like being abandoned? How did you heal? How can you avoid leaving your children alone and afraid? What is a good way to balance teaching children to be courageous without giving in too much to their fears?
Knowing that God does not leave us helpless but provides truth and His presence through the Holy Spirit makes me feel much more secure as a parent/grandparent!