Attention Conveying appropriate interest, concern, and care; taking notice of others and making an effort to enter into their respective worlds. (1 Corinthians 12:25 NASB) Attention to those outside the family of God
The song is kinda’ cool, mellow, and has no “bad message” as far as I can tell, but the lyrics struck me as I began writing this installment of the 52 Week Plan (not the “shabidoo, shabidoo, cha, cha…the other lyrics that sound like English.) Do you remember what it was like when you were a kid and a new friend came along, or as a teen you found out someone “liked you” and wanted to date you? I have to think back a long time, but I do remember some of those times. It felt really good to think that someone actually thought enough about you to spend time with you, didn’t it?
Even today, my wife and I are still “getting to know each other” and making more of an effort to use some time-tested intimacy principles to grow into knowing each other better and expressing care more deeply.
What might happen if we asked God to send us someone we could get to know better? What if we could discover a person, perhaps outside the faith, who needs a friend? We don’t have to be all that deeply mystical about it. Why don’t we just ask God to guide us, keep our eyes and heart open, express God’s love to care for them, and live the adventure entering the world of someone Jesus wants to love through us?
Willing to try? Let’s start this adventure. Who knows, you may find a friend on the way to being one. You might want to play the song one more time for inspiration…or not!? Doesn’t that “shabidoo” thing get you moving? OK, maybe not. ☺
THREE SOURCES OF LIGHT – Help Us Meet the Need of Attention for One Possibly Outside the Faith
Light Source #1: Jesus is the Light of the World (John 8:32) Walking in the Light: Experiencing God’s Love and Giving It Away (Attention)
Let’s Walk in the Light of Fresh Encounters with Jesus
Jesus entered the world of every person He encountered in some way or other. He entered our world when He came as a baby 2000 years ago. He was innocent when He was born and innocent when He died. Of no one else can that be said.
But He came, didn’t He? When you placed your faith in Jesus and began believing that He died as punishment for your sin, that He was buried, and that He came back from the grave on the third day; He entered your world and brought you back from the death sin had earned for you. You were born-again, and God put Holy Spirit in you as a down payment of things to come.
Choose some person from scripture with whom Jesus interacted and met a need. Some examples include Matthew, Saul/Paul, the woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery, the man born blind, Lazarus, Zacchaeus, and so on. After you have chosen one of these, I want you to attempt to “be” that person and imagine what it was for him/her to live before, during, and then after their encounter with Jesus.
Would you take just a few minutes to think about that and allow yourself to feel what it must have been to be brought into God’s new world as Jesus entered theirs?
Now would you remember what it is like for you to be a new creation, where old things are passing away and all things are becoming new? Remember. Reflect. Worship Jesus. Praise God for His mercy, grace and loving heart toward you. “Oh, how He loves you and me”…in the words of the song.
Light Source #2: God’s Word is a “Lamp and Light” (Psalm 119:105)
Walking in the Light: Experiencing God’s Love and Giving It Away (Attention)
Attention – Conveying appropriate interest, concern, and care; taking notice of others and making an effort to enter into their respective worlds. (1 Corinthians 12:25 NASB)
Let’s Do the Book: In John 9, Jesus entered the world of a man born blind. I want to ask God to let me enter the world of a person who may very well be trapped in the blind-darkness of not knowing the love of God in Jesus Christ. Would you be willing to ask God to send you someone whose world you could enter to show Jesus’ love?
Jesus was in His normal traffic pattern of life, as I can see it. He didn’t have to go on a special trip that day. Maybe along your normal traffic pattern of life, God has someone for you to attempt to enter his/her world.
There is no need to complicate this. Surely it could be that you have to spend a bunch of money to go around the world or another country or state to find someone whose world you could enter, but we don’t have to wait that long or make that many travel plans. For some of us, the person outside the faith into whose world we can enter is in our own home, or community, or school, or neighborhood, team, class, club, etc.
Entering another person’s world can be simple but not necessarily easy or intuitive at first. Want a little help? A. Take some time to observe or listen to him/her or them. B. Pay attention to signs that let you know what is important in their world. C. Pray-Ask God how you can communicate His love to them by letting them know you’d “like to get to know” them, then wait for a “no brainer” moment when you know the door to their world is opening to you. D. If / when they are open to having coffee, a meal, coming to your home, going out to a movie or activity with you, you and spouse, and/or your family, then take the steps to be respectful with their time and keep your word. (Put it on your calendar with reminders if needed.) E. To enter their world may mean going to a movie, out to dinner, going with them to an event or place you know they like (a restaurant, a movie, a sporting/music event, visiting them at their home or meeting them for lunch near their work place, should you be invited there, having coffee/meal to ask good questions and listen well.) F. Starting a conversation may also require some practice/experience unless you are already very engaging and a people-person. I usually stick with Family, Work or Work Background, Schooling or Training, Previous Towns of Residence, Sports or Other Hobbies, etc. If you go to a movie or event, you could certainly talk about the event/movie and the parts you liked. G. There is no need to force the situation. God is fully capable of connecting you to this new friend. Your part is to be willing and ready to make what may become a step toward a lasting friendship or at least a new acquaintance.
Light Source #3: Followers of Jesus are called the “Light of the World” (Matt 5:14)
Walking in the Light: Experiencing God’s Love and Giving It Away (Attention)
Attention – Conveying appropriate interest, concern, and care; taking notice of others and making an effort to enter into their respective worlds. (1 Corinthians 12:25 NASB)
Let’ Have Some Real Fellowship as a Couple, with another Christ-follower, or Family – (if your children are old enough to understand that you are building relationships not targeting prospects or projects).
On a Date, Special Together Time, over coffee/meal, these are some things you can discuss:
1. When you prayed about the person/family (who may be outside the faith) to engage, to whom did God lead you? Remember it really doesn’t matter if you know exactly where the person is in his/her walk with Jesus. These are people, not projects.
2. Did God lead each of you to a different person/family or are you getting to know your new friend(s) together?
3. Are there ways you can serve this person or family by meeting real needs? Do they simply want real friendships? Is the relationship making progress or on hold?
4. Try a Prayer – Care – Share approach. A great way to summarize what I am trying to convey is with this “Prayer-Care-Share” terminology. The website below can help with more ideas. A new friend of mine, Paul Cedar, introduced me to the concept more than 2 years ago, and it makes great sense and has proven very effective.
5. What differences might it have made in your life before marriage / now that you are married / if you are now divorced, if someone had taken time to know you, to enter your world, to pay attention and give you loving care?
6. When you were growing up did your parents enter your world, practice getting to know others, or equip you to give caring attention to others? What did they do? What could they have done better? What can you do now to do an even better job of sharing Jesus’ love as you enter the world of a spouse, a child, a neighbor, a person in your church, or someone outside the faith who needs a friend? Remember to pray and ask God for those He will lead you to in the church or outside it. The person He leads you to may not look outwardly like they need anything or anyone. Looking “just fine” doesn’t mean he/she is.
7. Finally, before we move on to next month’s Top Ten Relational Need, would you share with your spouse, family, or others what Jesus’ entrance into this big old world has meant to mankind? Would you describe for them the special blessing you experience knowing this Jesus whose birth we just celebrated?
Top 10 Relational Needs* (examples in scripture)
Acceptance – Receiving others willingly and unconditionally (even when their behavior has been imperfect) and loving them in spite of any differences that may exist between you. (Romans 15:7)
Affection – Expressing care and closeness through physical touch and through words such as “I love you” or “I care about you.” (Romans 16:16) (Mark 10:16)
Appreciation – Expressing thanks, praise or commendation, particularly in recognition of someone’s accomplishments or efforts. Gratefully acknowledging what someone “does.” (Colossians 3:15b; 1 Corinthians 11:2)
Approval (Blessing) – Building up or affirming another person, particularly for who they are (as opposed to what they do); affirming both the fact and the importance of our relationship with another person.( Ephesians 4:29; Mark 1:11)
Attention – Conveying appropriate interest, concern, and care; taking notice of others and making an effort to enter into their respective worlds. (1 Corinthians 12:25 NASB)
Comfort – Caringly responding to a hurting person through words, actions, emotional responses, and physical touch; hurting with and for others in the midst of their grief or pain. (Romans 12: 15 NASB; Matthew 5:4: 2 Corinthians 1:3-4)
Encouragement – Urging others to persist and persevere in their efforts to attain their goals; stimulating others toward love and good deeds. (1Thessalonians 5:11; Hebrews 10:24)
Respect – Valuing one another highly, treating one another as important, and honoring one another with our words and actions. (Romans 12:10; 1 Peter 2:17)
Security – (Peace) Establishing and maintaining harmony in our relationships and providing freedom from fear or threat of harm through expressions of vulnerability, deepening of trust, and the successful resolution of conflict. (Romans 12:16,18)
Support – Coming along side others and providing gentle, appropriate assistance with a problem or struggle. (Galatians 6:2)