Joint Accomplishment
“I need you.”
Enemy: Self-Reliance
Mutual Giving
“I love you.” Enemy: Selfishness
When certain ingredients are missing from a recipe, you notice it with the first bite. If these two relational essentials are missing from your marriage, the marriage may lack the sweetness and flavor God intends. Let’s add (or continue to add) the ingredients of Joint Accomplishment and Mutual Giving to our relationship. We hope you enjoy discussing Joint Accomplishment and Mutual Giving with your spouse this week!
Be intentional about setting aside a few minutes this week or planning a date night to discuss Joint Accomplishment and Mutual Giving together.
Husband, would you lead this time by reviewing the statements to be completed or questions being asked so that you know how to make the most of your time? When you are ready, please initiate a “LOVE (Speak)” time with your wife.
LOVE (Speak) —
1. Would you list a few characteristics of a “self-reliant” person? Describe what it would be like to attempt to have a close relationship with someone who is “self-reliant”. What might be a way to describe what is missing?
2. Would you list a few characteristics of a “selfish” person? Please describe what this relationship may need to have added in order to “taste great”.
3. How does the ingredient of “Joint Accomplishment” fit into your picture of a great marriage? Are you OK with needing your spouse to join you?
4. Mutual Giving is the relational quality of two people giving to each other selflessly. How does the ingredient of “Mutual Giving” fit into your picture of a great marriage?
5. Describe some ways you and your spouse have accomplished things together and felt the connection of “look what we did together”.
What About the Kids?
1. How do you feel a child can be taught the skill of Joint Accomplishment? What could you and your child of focus do together to help him or her learn Joint Accomplishment?
2. How would a child become a person willing to give rather than take? How does family model fit this learning process as a “stepping stone” or a “stumbling block”? Did your family of origin help you know how to be accomplish things together or to be selfless? Describe.