Vulnerable Communication “I trust you!” Enemy: Fear
A Worthy Goal: (a little “Truth in Love” from TBI)
Don’t stop investing wisely into your marriage and family until your children and friends envy your relationship and want what you have…. “faith expressing itself in love” – Galatians 5:6.
Two of our grandchildren used the phrase, “What ‘dat noise?” when they heard a strange sound. In fact, one of the two actually said more like, “What ‘dat a noisey?” Too often our words are just noise in an already noisy atmosphere. With a little help from our friends, I bet we could get better at communicating both in speaking and in listening adequately and appropriately. So much in our relationship depends on whether we can say what we mean and listen to understand what the other person is really saying. Willing to try? Let’s Go! . Please don’t hesitate to let us know if you have any questions or suggestions for us!
Have a great week!
Sincerely, Dave Lewis The Basic Idea Helping Leaders Live Loved and Give Love Freely….Starting at Home!
Set aside a few minutes this week or plan a date night to discuss VULNERABLE COMMUNICATION. Husband, would you lead this time? Please be prepared to lead by reviewing the questions below. When ready, please initiate a “LOVE (Speak)” time
LOVE (SPEAK) Light Source #1: Fresh Encounters with Jesus Christ
You might need a Bible for this one!
1. Jesus spoke in vulnerable terms with His disciples many times, but especially during the last hours they were all together. He told them that they were welcomed to pray with Him because His “soul was grieved unto death”. (Mt. 26:38) No wonder, Jesus was asking for their friendship and support because He was facing the cross and the suffering it carried.
Is Jesus vulnerable and does He desire vulnerability only with disciples in the first century? Jesus invites us to “come to Him”. We are invited to “cast our cares on Him”. Would you quietly picture Jesus, strong carpenter-armed Savior with the look of welcome in His eyes? Would you tell Him how much you need His friendship and love, then thank Him for it? Would you ask Him what He wants most from you?
What is His response to your admission of need as well as your question of Him?
Light Source #2: Frequent Experiences in the Word (Do The Book)
Let’s Do: James 1: 19 – My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.
2. How would “fear” be a hindrance to Vulnerable Communication? How has fear hindered your ability to communicate vulnerably with your spouse or others?
3. How would practicing “being quick to hear and slow to speak” help remove fear or feelings of not being heard in your marriage?
Please give each other opportunity to ask, listen, respond with care, and give support as needed and wanted.
Light Source #3: Other Jesus Followers – Have Real Fellowship with Your Spouse
4. Would you talk with each other about the questions above during a date night or coffee time or just lying in bed? It would be better if you have answered each question thoroughly first.
5. Would you pray with your spouse or on your own the following prayer: “Father, would you help me to use my ears to listen before I put my mouth in gear to speak – wherever possible? Would you help me to use my words to build up, encourage, and bring peace wherever those are needed…especially with my spouse and family?
Now — What About the Kids? “Ask – Listen – Respond”
1. Would you and your child share examples of times when words from someone else made you feel loved and encouraged? How about sharing another time when words hurt or discouraged you? Please remember to “rejoice” or “mourn” as appropriate. Do Romans 12:15.
Guess what? You may have just been an example of Vulnerable Communication for your child.
2. Who in your early childhood and teen years provided a good model for vulnerable communication – they revealed what was going on inside them truthfully, lovingly; and they listened to discover what was really going on inside another?
Vulnerable Communication—It’s in the Book!!
Romans 12:15
Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.