Let’s start out by looking at what an intimate marriage is NOT!
It is not:
- Living as roommates.
- Going out to dinner and having nothing to talk about.
- Living in the same house but living separate lives.
- Depending on ourselves.
- All about You-What needs your spouse can meet for you.
- What you can take from your partner.
- Demanding your spouse meet your needs.
- Speaking the truth without love.
- Not speaking essential truth trying to appear loving
- Ignoring each other – way too often.
- Yelling and screaming – way too often.
Do you see your marriage in any of the statements above? If you answered “yes”, do you want to change that? Anything worth fighting for requires work on your part, right? Sometimes we fight the wrong opponent. Well, if you are ready to get started on a better path? Let’s get to work!
In Genesis God called all he created “Good” except one thing…Genesis 2:18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” God saw all He created and that it was good, except for the man being alone. After God sent Eve as an answer to Adam’s aloneness, God called things “very good”. From the time he was created Adam was with God and had access to Him. Adam walked with Him daily in the Garden; yet, God said that Adam was alone! Doesn’t that show the value God places on the marriage relationship?
What does it mean to NOT be alone?
You are not alone…
- When you have a close companion.
- When you have an intimate friend, a soulmate.
- When you share your life together.
- When you have someone to laugh and cry with.
- When you feel safe and supported.
- When you deeply know someone and they know you deeply.
- When you not only know each other but truly care for each other.
God created each of us with relational needs that can only be met in meaningful relationships with God and others – your near ones. When your spouse meets your deepest needs, you feel fulfilled, valued, known and not alone. You can imagine if our marriages reflected the “What an intimate marriage is NOT” list, that we would feel very alone even though living with our spouse in the same home.
We hope and pray that each month as we look at the Relational Needs in our 52 Week Plan that you and your spouse will grow closer, and that each week your partner feels a little less alone than the week before.
Here is your mission for the week, “if you choose to accept it”.
- Please look over the Top Ten Relational Needs (Link Below) and have a discussion with your spouse about the 2 or 3 needs you feel are most important to you. Then, guess your spouse’s top 2-3
- Want to learn more accurately what your and your partner’s priority needs are, then take this assessment to find out!
Have questions? Please email us The Basic Idea. We are here to help!